...a pictorial tribute
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NOW in the sixth year of the conflict the tribe dwelt in the land of Syria in the village of Innsaria which is by the Tyre and Sidon.
2. And the windows of heaven were opened, and rain was upon the earth.
3. And Har Tilney, father of the tribe gathered unto him his chieftains and elders and said unto them,
4. “Verily, the news is better than the weather! On the twelth day of the first month so we journey by boat to the land of the Eyeties, and the sons of evil shall tremble at the sound of our coming.”
5. So it came to pass that the sons of Hussar came unto the Italy, a land flowing with vino rosso and marsala, and they arraigned themselves for battle.
6. But the enemy were still afar off and they must need journey to the mountains of the north where the snow lay and it was cold.
7. And they came unto the mountains and dug holes in which to live. And the snow and the rain did fill the holes, and the children were cold indeed.
8. And in the morning they did shoot at the enemy from afar. And for each shot they did receive one shot. For it was a gentleman’s war.
9. And neither they nor the enemy did move, nor did the steel steeds, for there was much mud.
10. Now with the changing of the season the sun shone, and the tribe moved and halted at the town which is called Ruffio to the east of the land.And they made ready once more to meet the Hitlerite.
11. They oiled their steeds of steel, and cleaned their guns and sharpened their swords and lifeted their hearts in exhultation and flogged petrol and got drunk.
12. And the Warlord said unto Har Tilney, “Go up against the land of the Valley of the Po, even against it and against the city of Medicina. Waste and utterly destroy it.”
AND on the ninth day of the fourth month they went forth to meet the enemy.
2. And the sound of battle was in the land.
3. The young men with their steeds of steel did belch forth in their fury in the face of the enemy with the roar of a raging lion. And the earth and the heavens were filled with a great noise.
4. And a devouring fire rained on the land and upon the Hitlerites and the earth shook with the sound thereof.
5. And the dwellings of the inhabitants were consumed with fire. Great was their tribulation.
6. And the Warlord did call forth his armour to hurl at the bastions of the enemy. And the Hitlerites were sorely tried, yet they would not lie down.
7. And on the seventh day of the battle the city was reached.
8. Then Har Tilney called unto him an elder of the tribe and said, “Bodge, take thee and thy company to the edge of the city, and shufti.”
9. Bodge was a mighty man of valour. And in the evening he beheld the city burning with fire. And he cried unto his company mounted in their steeds of steel, “This day shall the glory of thy deeds shine in the heavens, and the stories of thy valour shall be passed down to thy children’s children and shall not perish. Nor shall the memories of thy triumphs dim even with the passing of the ages. NOW FINGERS OUT – AND FOLLOW ME!”
10. And into the centre of the town rode he and his mighty men as a rushing and scorching wind. And their guns hurled forth javelins of fire into the hosts of the enemy without ceasing.
11. And the young men of the Hitlerites fell in the streets and their men of war were cut off on that day.
12. And they did flee from the city and from their holes in the ground, and the dead were without number.
13. Thus were the broad walls of Medicina utterly broken and her high gates burned with fire.
14. And the young men if the Hussars did chase the enemy and went motoring.
15. And they passed through the valley of the Po unto the mountains of the north.
16. And the Hitlerites battled no more and were utterly defeated and laid down their arms.
17. And peace was upon the land.
AND it came to pass in the third month of the peace that the men of Hussar came unto the town which is called Chiavari.
2. And behold, the sun shone and the city was fair to look upon and the hearts of the people rejoiced.
3. And they took the city unto themselves for their own use, and started main guards.
4. And they swam in the waters of the sun which was warm, and danced by the setting sun. And they drank sweet wines in the inns and lay in the fields by the light of the moon for the daughters of the land were exceedingly fair.
5. And they ate, drank and made merry for the world was at peace.
6. And they did name the city “Bella Chivari” which is in the language of the land.
7. And they betook themselves unto much learning and reading of books and there arose prophets amongst them who rose high in the ranks of the tribe.
8. And they did drill in the early morning and cut capers in the road which led unto the camp.
9. And in the course of time the prophet arose and took himself to a high place and called unto the children of Hussar saying, “Woe unto us sons of Hussar for a mighty voice spake unto me in a vision. And lo, I beheld seven eagles each holding his young, and seven sceptres and seven earths were held in each of their seven claws. And the eagles did stretch their wings and flew out of the sun into the clouds of darkness. And the mighty voice spoke saying, “All good things come to an end.”
10. And the words of the prophet were fulfilled, and the good things came to an end, and the children of Hussar went out from the fair city and came to the place called Milan, which was a town full of evil.
11. And some of the young men were afflicted, and journeyed away on the sixteen tram, they and their small packs.
AND they journeyed from the land of the Eyeties into the land of the Hitlerite who were now at peace.
2. And they pitched their camp by the plain which is called Luneburg.
3. And there was a YMCA there.
4. Then did many of the children of Hussar depart from the camp and take themselves to their dwellings unto their wives and children for they got their tickets.
5. And those that were left took unto their bosom the remnants of the tribe of Recce, mighty men of valour and renowned in battle. And they became one with the tribe of Hussar.
6. And the sons of Recce brought with them their chariots and their wagons and their guns and their swords and all their goods and their overcoats.
7. And when they assembled themselves by the house of Hussar, they and their chariots and their goods and their chattels in a great crowd there was chaos in the camp for not one of the tribe of Hussar, nor one of the tribe of Recce, nay, not even the quartermaster, knew what was which, or what was what.
8. Now after this they put on new raiment and cleaned their boots. And on their breasts they carried medals of many colours. The Star of Africa and of Italy and of Germany and of Burma and many other decorations yea, even unto the Defence Medal.
9. And when the daughters of the house of ATS saw the men of valour they were pleased, and this was mutual. And they danced together and were content. And some took the daughters unto them to be their wives and did marry whilst their brethren drank and sang songs in the Rose of England.
NOW when all this was finished, the tribe of Hussar came to Wuppertal which is in the Ruhr.
2. An behold the young men did look with fondness on the daughters of the land and did frat when they didn’t oughter.
3. And they did find tables under which to put their feet. And they traded and bartered against the laws of the land. But they waxed rich, yet no so rich as the Quartermaster, for his fags are numbered as the sands of the desert.
4. And the father of the tribe, and the elders and chiefs of the tribe took unto themselves stallions, which were their first love, and rode in the hills and in the valleys in the early morning and were content.
5. And the young men of the tribe took unto themselves such pleasures as was their wont in all the lands of the earth and were content.
6. And the tribe watched over the land.
7. And the steeds of steel were silent.
8. And the windows of heaven opened, and rain fell upon the earth.
9. And it is still raining. Amen.